ACT ONE

The Chorus sing Song: “LIFE IS A LOTTERY”, then over to the Court of Theseus, Duke of Athens, who is preparing for his wedding to Hippolyta, a Venezuealan firebrand, whom he beat in the bidding for the 2004 Olympics, thanks to his massive lottery backing. They recall how they met and fell in love. Song: “THE VENEZUELAN TANGO”. Lysander & Demetrius enter, two Greek athletes, then Egeus, an old man, and his daughter Hermia, who loves Lysander. However Egeus has betrothed her to Demetrius, who is rich, and invokes an ancient Athenian law, whereby he can choose who his daughter marries, and if she refuses, she will be sent to a convent. Hermia is still obstinate despite the law, and Theseus advises her to reflect, and make her decision on the Duke’s wedding day. It is well known, too, that Demetrius chatted up Helena, who is now besotted with him. All leave except Lysander & Hermia who plot to elope. Song: “DREAM ON”. Helena appears, and the lovers tell her they are to elope, meeting that night at the Palace Wood, a mile out of town, which is supposed to be haunted. The lovers depart, and Helena vows to use the information for her own ends.

Enter “The Rude Mechanicals” – a group of 6 workers, constructing the Olympic Stadium, Song: “RUDE MECHANICALS” They are amateur actors who have been engaged to perform a play at the Duke’s wedding. The one with the biggest ego is Bottom. Peter [or Peta, if female] Quince, their director, hands them their parts to study. Reprise: “RUDE MECHANICALS”

In Palace Wood, a trio of Mafiosi, Robin Goodfella, and the Corleone brothers, Luigi and Gino, enter Song: “GOODFELLA” [A Gangsta Rap] Robin persuades the other two to leave while he awaits Oberon, an old friend, who had sent for him. He hides as the [highly feminine] Girl Fairies of Titania and the [highly masculine] Boy Fairies of Oberon enter Song: “PRETTY LITTLE FAIRIES” Enter Oberon & Titania. They used to be an item once, but dumped each other. However Oberon needs Titania’s accountant, as his own has been fiddling the books, and he’s convinced he can woo her into releasing him – and maybe resuming their relationship. Song: “YOU FANCY ME” Titania refuses, and flounces off. Oberon sends the Fairies away, and Robin Goodfella emerges from hiding. Oberon is determined to best Titania, and asks Robin, who he suggests should call himself Puck, as a more Fairy-friendly name, to find a special herb, which has the power to make the person it’s used on fall in love with the next living thing it sees – be it man, fowl, or beast! He intends to use it on Titania hoping she falls in love with something vile, before he applies the antidote. Puck leaves to find the herb, and Oberon –invisible to mortals – stays to overhear Demetrius & Helena as they enter. Helena is madly in love with Demetrius who wants nothing to do with her Song: “THE ROUNDABOUT OF LOVE” They leave and Oberon takes pity on Helena and asks Puck, when he returns with the herb, to sprinkle some of it on Demetrius’s eyes. He tells Puck he’ll easily recognize him as he’s dressed as an athlete. They exit, and Titania and her fairies enter. Titania is tired and her fairies sing her to sleep Reprise: “DREAM ON”. The fairies leave Titania asleep, and Oberon sprinkles the herb over her eyes, then leaves.

Lysander and Hermia enter, weary, and lay down for a sleep. Puck enters, sees Lysander dressed as an athlete, assumes it’s Demetrius, sprinkles the herb over his eyes, and exits. Demetrius and Helena enter, but Demetrius runs off. Helena sees Lysander on the ground, at first thinks he’s dead then wakes him up. He sees her, and, through the potion, immediately falls in love with her. Helena is baffled and distraught that he declares his love for her, and leaves in a huff. Lysander, smitten, follows her. Hermia wakes up, having dreamt that Lysander had fallen out of love with her. Finding him gone, she leaves.

The Rude Mechanicals enter to rehearse the play. They imagine all the benefits it might bring them. Song: “FAME AND FORTUNE” Puck enters, sees the amateur actors, and determines to play some mischief, so when Bottom exits as part of the rehearsal he follows him, and puts an ass’s head on him. When Bottom returns, the other Mechanicals run off scared.

Titania wakes, sees Bottom, and, thanks to the herb, falls instantly in love with him. She summons her fairies and tells them to supply anything Bottom wants. Bottom is in heaven…Act One Finale: “ROCK BOTTOM” [For all]

END OF ACT ONE

ACT TWO

Song: “HERO OR VILLAIN” [For all] Oberon & Puck enter. Bottom tells Oberon that Titania fell in love with an ass. Hermia & Demetrius enter,Demetrius besotted. Puck says he’s bewitched Demetrius & Oberon realizes it’s the wrong athlete! Hermia leaves and Demetrius settles down to sleep. Oberon & Puck hurl recriminations at each other – quietly, so as not to wake Demetrius. Song: “QUIET QUARREL” Oberon sprinkles the herb over Demetrius’s eyes, telling him to fall in love with Helena when he wakes. Oberon & Puck exit as Lysander & Helena enter, Lysander besotted with Helena. Demetrius awakes and falls in love with Helena, who now has the 2 men in love with her. Hermia enters. All 4 quarrel with each other, and threaten to do physical harm. Song: “KUNG FU” The exit, still intent on mischief.

Oberon & Puck enters. Oberon is determined to undo all the mischief that’s been causes, and casts a fog over the wood and exits. Enter the 4 lovers separately, unable to see each other, and, utterly weary, go to sleep on the ground. Reprise: “DREAM ON” as Puck sprinkles the herb over Lysander & exits.

Enter Titania, Bottom and her Fairies. Bottom, too, is tired and falls asleep in Titania’s arms. Song: “BLUES ON A FOGGY NIGHT” Titania, too, falls asleep, and the Fairies leave. Oberon & Puck enter. Oberon lifts the fog, and sprinkles the remedy over Titania, then wakes her. She’s horrified to see Bottom. Puck removers the ass’s head, and Oberon, Puck & Titania exit.

Enter Theseus, Hippolyta & Egeus. They have been hunting, and see the 4 lovers & Bottom asleep, and wake the 4 lovers, who, with the enchantment properly applied, are all sweetness and light and happily restored in love with the correct partners. Theseus rules that as they are so obviously in love, he revokes the ancient law, and arranges for the 2 couples to marry, at the same time as he and Hippolyta. But when they want to return to court, they find the horses gone, so Hippolyta says the best way to take a long journey, is to dance, as they do in Venezuela. Song: “EVERYBODY CONGA”

All leave. Bottom wakes up and leaves. The other Mechanicals arrive, depressed that they can’t do the play without Bottom, when he turns up They leave for a final rehearsal.

Back in Athens, the 3 couples, plus Titania & Oberon enter to Music: “WEDDING MARCH”. The Mechanicals present their execrable – and ludicrously funny! – play, and the show finishes with Finale: “DREAM ON”, followed by a post-curtain “FAME & FORTUNE”