Musicline School Musicals
Porridge Cover

Porridge

by Craig Hawes

Pricing & Order Info.

"I would just like to let you know how much we have enjoyed performing Porridge. The script was well written and very funny on both a child and adult level. Even though there were a lot of lines for our 8 and 9 year old children to learn they rose to the challenge and did a fantastic job. I would highly recommend this script to any other primary teacher."

Beverley Taylor, Year 4 Teacher, Market Harborough Church of England Primary School, Market Harborough

Ideal Cast Size 50
Speaking Roles 42
Minimum Cast Size 28
Duration (minutes)60-70

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Why choose this Musical?

42 speaking roles & 2 non-speaking roles

This can be reduced to 26 speaking roles. See "Casting" tab below.

NEW Sing It! Mk. 4 version, now with...

  • "Volume Control" feature
  • "Minimise Window" feature
  • "Lyrics Off" feature
  • "Vocals Off" feature
  • "Line by Line" practising feature
  • "Phrase by Phrase" practising feature

A BRAND NEW product; a CD-ROM or download of all the songs called "Sing it!" is available. This CD-ROM or download can teach the songs to the children without any teacher input. Children can use it at school or at home - think of the time it will save you! Most schools use it in class on an interactive white board or in the school hall on the overhead projector to allow full cast practice. Children LOVE learning this way and the product is foolproof.

Read the "Sing it!" reviews
'The "Sing it!" products were fantastic.' The Downs School, Bristol.
'Absolutely amazing material.' Mary O'Neill-Delano, Canada.
' "Sing it!" is fantastic for us less musically inclined teachers.' The Coppice Primary, Worcestershire.
'I really appreciate the "Sing it!" component as we often use this in rehearsals.' Newborough East Primary, Victoria, Australia.
'Can I also say that your "Sing it!" CD was brilliant.' Key Stage 2 teacher, Singapore.

CD of Vocal Tracks

Both these CDs include Overture, ALL Songs, Special Effects, Play Ons and Play Offs in the order you need them enabling production and direction to take place without specialist musical expertise. However - for those of you who prefer a live pianoforte accompaniment, we now have available a superb BRAND NEW Performance Score which encompasses Overture, ALL Play Ons and Play Offs, Songs, Link Music, Cues and Chord Symbols. (Grade 6 standard). We also have available a BRAND NEW Rehearsal Score (Grade 2 / 3 standard) - Check them out on the "Script and Songs" heading.

Dance it! Available

Another BRAND NEW product is the "Dance it!" Choreography DVD. Watch each song performed by a group of age-appropriate children in two different versions - a full speed 'Performance' version and a slowed down 'Step By Step' version with helpful narration to guide you through the dance. Introduced by Craig Hawes, the DVD is also packed with lots of handy hints for teaching dances. Absolutely no previous experience or expertise is needed.

Read the latest "Dance it!" reviews
'The "Dance it!" DVD was great.' St Hugh's Catholic Primary, Lincolnshire.
'For the first time we used the "Dance it!" DVD and found it wonderful.' Rising Starz Performing Arts, New Zealand.
'"Dance it!" videos were very useful.' Sacred Heart Catholic Primary, Hertfordshire.
'Loved having the Choreography (Dance it!) video this year. That really helped our choreographer get the kids started and when she was sick, we could still rehearse their dance moves.' The American School, Marrakesh.
'Loved the "Dance it!" that came with "Porridge" and would love similar for other productions. Makes my life so much easier.' Aria School, New Zealand.

Full Performance Piano/Vocal Score available (Grade 6 Standard)

Encompasses Overture, ALL Play Ons and Play Offs, Songs, Link Music, Cues and Chord Symbols. Click "Performance Score" in the "Script & Songs" tab below.

Easy Play Rehearsal Piano/Vocal Score available (Grade 2 / 3 Standard)

Click "Easy Play Score" in the "Script & Songs" tab below.

CD of Backing Tracks plus essential sound effects

No pianist required!

Easily manageable props

Unlimited chorus parts

Easy to stage and costume

Age range: Lower Key Stage 2 Production (7-9 years)

Duration: 60-70 minutes

NEW! Instant Scenery with our digital backdrops
A different backdrop for EVERY scene change

Supplied in both a PowerPoint presentation and as individual JPG files.

School Play Backdrop
No more Scenery Painting!

Craig Hawes, author of Pirates Of The Curry Bean, serves up his funniest show ever with Porridge the stirring musical comedy that begins "Once upon a crime"!

When a crime wave hits Happy Valley, there's a caseload of mysteries to be solved! Who's stolen Ma Hubbard's recipe book? Who's kidnapped Marigold the cow? And what dirty secret is Papa Bear hiding behind his Porridge empire? It's down to Private Detective Jack Spratt to uncover the terrifying truth in this tale of mystery, mayhem and breakfast cereal!

Join Jack, Goldie Lox and a cast of crazy characters including barmy billy goats, loopy lumberjacks, a potty police squad and a runaway cow in this brand new side-splitting musical comedy. It's a familiar tale, told like you've never heard before with familiar fairytale folk brought to life as you've never imagined! Porridge has all the ingredients of a delicious production - packed with spoonfuls of sparkling songs and bowlfuls of belly-laughs, this hilarious show will leave your cast and audience wanting seconds and shouting for more!

In the prologue our moody, mysterious narrator Jack Spratt, Private Detective, introduces himself and explains how crime has swept through Happy Valley. Dramatic music begins as the stage suddenly becomes an exciting whirl of frantic activity with a police squad in hot pursuit of an unknown criminal. Two reporters bring us the latest news of crime on the streets whilst a crowd of anxious onlookers gather and begin to sing the opening song, "Once Upon A Crime!".

The song ends and we are transported to Jack Spratt's office, where Jack calls the Police Chief about a recent case. Goldie Lox enters with a suitcase and, following a very comical set of misunderstandings, explains to Jack that she is in desperate need of his help. As she begins to tell Jack her story, a flashback transports us in space and time to the previous morning at The Dairy.

We discover the absent-minded Mother Hubbard who has once again lost her only cow, Marigold. Goldie enters and reminds Mother Hubbard that she is always losing things, such as her precious recipe book that went missing years ago. Simple Simon enters and he and Goldie unsuccessfully try to comfort Mother Hubbard. All are relieved when the local fairytale characters find and return the wandering cow to the dairy. Following a slapstick milking session, Tom-Tom arrives with a pig under his arm and the police in pursuit. Simon hides Tom-Tom just as the inept police squad enter. Pompous Inspector Drain interrogates the locals and with a little bribery discovers and arrests the innocent Tom-Tom.

Our two reporters return with live coverage of the reopening of The Porridge Pot Diner, Happy Valley's finest restaurant. The staff and customers give a rousing reception to owner Papa Bear, his wife Mama Bear and their son Junior, and celebrate by singing "The Porridge Pot". Goldie enters and chats with her friend Junior, who expresses his frustration that although he wants to be an inventor, his father expects him to work in the "family business". The Bear family are interviewed by the reporter and the scene ends with a rousing reprise of "The Porridge Pot".

Jack Spratt then takes us to the Porridge Pot's back room, where Papa Bear has a secret meeting with his half-witted henchmen, the Billy Goat brothers. It becomes clear that these furry felons are behind the recent crime wave, all part of Papa Bear's evil plan to flatten Happy Valley, build a giant Porridge Factory and take over the world! He gives them a list of crimes to commit and people to frame, along with a suitcase of cash to pay the lumberjacks to flatten the forest. He also reveals his secret suitcase full of evil plans - and Mother Hubbard's recipe book that he stole from her years ago which helped him build his restaurant and porridge empire.

Down at the Police Station, Inspector Drain is expressing his frustration over the recent crime wave and his squad's lack of policing skills. PC Plod is more interested in his suitcase of nuts which he proudly displays to everyone. An emergency call informs them that Humpty has been involved in a horrific wall related incident. The action moves immediately to Hickory Hospital, where Humpty is operated upon by Doctor Foster and Nurse Polly in a brief but hilarious medical drama. We switch straight back to the Police Station where we learn that Humpty was pushed. Bo Peep enters to report stolen sheep, and a comical identity parade leads the police to arrest the wrong suspect. Peter Piper is questioned about stealing pickled peppers, and in the face of all this crime Inspector Drain tells his squad it is time to spring into action. The ensemble enter to sing the comedy action song "Boys In Blue".

The following cold and frosty morning at the Mulberry Bush, Jack is on the watch for suspicious activity. Sure enough, the Billy Goats enter having kidnapped Marigold the cow. Papa Bear enters for another secret meeting but is overheard by his son Junior, who is horrified to discover the truth behind the family business. The lumberjacks enter and, after displaying their tree-felling skills, are hired by the Billy Goats who tell them to collect a suitcase of cash from The Porridge Pot at midnight. Mother Hubbard and Simon are searching for missing cow Marigold when Goldie brings them the ransom note she has found and vows to pack her case and go searching for Marigold. Simon tells Mother Hubbard to be positive and he and the ensemble cheer her up with the song "It's Up To You".

Later that evening we find a sad and reflective Junior Bear wondering how to deal with the truth about his father and why he cannot be who he wants to be. We also find Goldie who, too, dreams to be more than she is, and together they sing the touching duet "While The World Is Sleeping". At the end of the song, the two friends meet and tell each other everything. Junior hatches a plan and returns to The Porridge Pot whilst Goldie, suitcase in hand, goes to the office of Jack Spratt--and we suddenly find ourselves back at the very point where the story started. Goldie explains that Junior will leave his father's suitcase of incriminating secret plans at the restaurant for them to discover, and she and Jack set off to save the day.

Back at the Porridge Pot, the bears' evening porridge appears to be too hot to eat. Junior cleverly suggests they leave for a long, slow night time walk whilst it cools and as they leave he positions his father's secret suitcase for Goldie to discover. During a fast paced farce-like scene, various groups of characters enter and leave the restaurant with other suitcases of clothes, cash and nuts, each getting mixed up with the others. In a faithful nod to the traditional tale, the three bowls of porridge are tasted, Junior's chair is broken and Goldie is accidentally knocked unconscious, leaving her lying on the floor asleep and snoring loudly. When the bears return, they discover Goldie and call the police who arrive instantly to arrest her. However, the other groups enter one by one revealing the surprising contents of each suitcase. When the Billy Goats accidentally reveal the truth, Papa Bear denies all, but Junior finally finds his voice and courageously speaks up against his father. Mother Hubbard is reunited with her cow and recipe book and at last the police arrest the true criminal, Papa Bear. With a final word from Jack Spratt, the story is brought to a joyful conclusion as the ensemble sing the exciting finale song "Happy Ever After".

Suggested Cast List For 50 Actors

In the following list, the number shows how many spoken lines each role has. An asterisk (*) before the character's name indicates that this character ALSO has solo or featured sung lines.

Character NameNumber of Lines
Jack Spratt64
Papa Bear61
Chief Inspector Drain51
* Goldie Lox48
Mother Hubbard48
* Junior Bear37
Little Bill36
* Simple Simon32
PC Plod29
Big Bill27
Mama Bear24
Middle Bill22
Dwayne Pipe22
PC Doughnut19
PC Fuzzbut17
Rusty Hairclips16
PC Flatfoot15
Nurse Polly14
Woody14
Tom-Tom13
Peter Piper13
Doctor Foster12
Bo Peep11
Humpty Dumpty8
Pip The Paperboy6
Miss Muffet6
Wee Willie Winky4
Roxy2
Ruby2
Ruthie2
Renee2
Rosie2
Rita2
Rhonda2
Robyn2
Twiggy2
Splinter2
Chopper2
Barker1
Timber1
Plank1
Chip1

Non Speaking Roles: Marigold the Cow (two actors) and six additional Happy Valley Folk (Prologue and Scenes two, four, five and seven).
In addition to the above characters two actors from the company will be required to act also as framed pictures of Wicked Witch and BB Wolf in Jack Spratt's 'Rogue Gallery'.

Suggested Cast List For 28 Actors

In the following list, the number shows how many spoken lines each role has. An asterisk (*) before the character's name indicates that this character ALSO has solo or featured sung lines.

Character NameNumber of Lines
Jack Spratt64
Papa Bear61
Chief Inspector Drain51
* Goldie Lox48
Mother Hubbard48
* Junior Bear37
Little Bill36
* Simple Simon32
PC Plod29
Big Bill27
Mama Bear24
Middle Bill
also plays non speaking BB Wolf in Prologue
22
Dwayne Pipe22
Ruby
also covers the lines of Renee, Rita and Robyn, and also plays Nurse Polly
22
Roxy
also covers the lines of Ruthie, Rosie and Rhonda, and also plays Dr Foster
20
PC Doughnut19
Wee Willie Winky
also plays Woody
18
PC Fuzzbut17
Rusty Hairclips16
PC Flatfoot15
Tom-Tom
also plays Splinter
15
Peter Piper13
Bo Peep11
Miss Muffet
also plays Twiggy, and also covers Chopper's line in Scene seven
9
Humpty Dumpty8
Pip The Paperboy
also plays Wicked Witch in Prologue
6

Non Speaking Roles: Marigold the Cow (two actors, who could be coerced adults, thereby reducing the number of actors required to 26).
NB. For this cast reduction, some of the Lumberjack roll call lines in Scene five will need to be omitted (or amended).

5 Star Rating

Porridge

"This show was fantastic. You receive so much support with the visual backdrops, backing tracks and information, tips, hints etc. The students absolutely loved the script and performing and the audience loved it - lots of laughs. A real fun show"
Andrea Harding, West Ulverstone Primary School, Ulverstone

5 Star Rating

Porridge

"I would just like to let you know how much we have enjoyed performing Porridge. The script was well written and very funny on both a child and adult level. Even though there were a lot of lines for our 8 and 9 year old children to learn they rose to the challenge and did a fantastic job. I would highly recommend this script to any other primary teacher."
Beverley Taylor, Year 4 Teacher, Market Harborough Church of England Primary School, Market Harborough

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Prices for ALL our products INCLUDE V.A.T. where applicable. A complete breakdown of V.A.T. content is included on your invoice.
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  Downloads

Instant Downloads allow you to pay online with a Credit/Debit Card or PayPal and instantly download your materials as PDFs and/or MP3s.

Product Name Product Price Qty
Script (Non-editable PDF) £10.00
Script (Editable Word Doc) £12.00
PDF & Word Doc Scripts £15.00
PDF Performance Piano Score (Grade 6 Standard) £12.00
PDF Easy Play Rehearsal Piano Score (Grade 2/3 Standard) £10.00
MP3 Backing Tracks £10.00
MP3 Vocal Tracks £10.00
Sing it! MK4 Download (PC)What's this? £10.00
Sing it! MK4 Download (MAC)What's this? £10.00
Dance it! Choreography Video DownloadWhat's this? £10.00
Backdrops (PowerPoint and JPGs)What's this? £15.00

  Posted

The traditional means of getting your items. Most of our works are RING BOUND books or CDs of recorded music.

U.K. schools can order posted items with a school order number.
This facility is available at the end of the ordering process.

Non U.K. posted items are sent express tracked airmail delivery anywhere in the world. Musicline subsidise this service.

Product Name Product Price Qty
Script £14.00
Pack of 5 Scripts £35.00
Pack of 10 Scripts £55.00
Performance Piano Score (Grade 6 Standard) £16.00
Easy Play Rehearsal Piano Score (Grade 2/3 Standard) £13.00
CD of Backing Tracks £13.00
CD of Vocal Tracks £13.00
Sing it! MK4 CD-ROM (PC & MAC)What's this? £15.00
Dance it! Choreography DVDWhat's this? £15.00
CD-ROM of BackdropsWhat's this? £19.00

  Performing Licence: valid for 12 months from date of issue for THIS musical only

The Musicline Performing Licence covers you to perform this musical.

It is illegal to perform ANY published musical without the appropriate licence which is only available from the publisher of that musical.

'Blanket' licences which you may have DO NOT cover the performing of published musicals.

A performing licence is required for EACH PERFORMANCE.

Size of your School Size Price per Performance Price Number of Performances Number
200+ Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £30.00
150-199 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £25.00
100-149 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £20.00
50-99 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £15.00
0-49 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £10.00
Youth Theatre (any size) £50.00

  Copying Licence: valid for 12 months from date of issue for THIS musical only

The Musicline Copying Licence covers you to copy ALL of any of the items you buy for this show either posted or downloaded.

This Licence is only available from the publisher of the copyright material.

It is illegal to reproduce or share ANY published material without the appropriate licence.

Size of your School Size Price of Licence Price Qty Qty
200+ Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £30.00
150-199 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £25.00
100-149 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £20.00
50-99 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £15.00
0-49 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £10.00
Youth Theatre (any size) £50.00

  Video Licence: valid for 12 months from date of issue for THIS musical only

The Musicline Video Licence allows you to record your performances and sell the DVDs without royalty payments applying. The Video Licence is given FREE OF CHARGE if you order a Performing Licence and a Copying Licence at the same time. Only fill in the box below if you wish to purchase a video licence separately.

Size of your School Size Price of Licence Price Qty Qty
200+ Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £30.00
150-199 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £25.00
100-149 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £20.00
50-99 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £15.00
0-49 Pupils on Total School Roll (Ofsted Figures) £10.00
Youth Theatre (any size) £50.00